Friend stages!

I read a really interesting article in New York Times about friendships through the course of time that really got me thinking. It talks about how complicated it gets to make friends over the different life stages- college, work, once you are a couple and once you have kids.

Link to article: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/15/fashion/the-challenge-of-making-friends-as-an-adult.html?pagewanted=all

The article struck a cord with me because my husband and I keep talking about this- we are past the college phase, and we find ourselves in the middle of work and couple stage. After the fun filled stage of tons of friends and endless fun, the next stages are daunting and annoying!

My own experience does mirror what the article spoke about- I have often spent time with my work colleagues and with my husband’s colleagues from work. It starts off as fun- dinners and fun happy hours but eventually promotions and bonuses rear their ugly head. It ends up getting awkward, and somehow the new friends slowly disappear! When did it become completely appropriate to talk about money over dinner with acquaintances?

And don’t get me started on the whole couple double dating- it is becoming incredibly difficult to find the perfect pair. It really feels like you are blind dating! It starts the same way-we are excited about the idea of meeting a new couple to hang out with, you click with one of the people but it is really awkward with the other, and ends with no call and no second date! One of my most awkward double dates-we met a couple where the wife didn’t really talk to us through dinner, then after a few drinks decided to talk continuously about her life in third person. It was so incredibly awkward! At some point, just like dating, we have gotten a bit jaded- when did it get this hard to find a couple who are social, fun and easy to hang out?!?

I blame FRIENDS and the other TV shows that make friendships in the 20s and 30s look so easy- real life doesn’t quiet live up to it! (Thank you Alex Williams for giving a much needed reality check and making us feel more normal!)

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